Get Happier

We know this, don't we?

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On this rainy Sunday that feels like winter has returned to Sydney, I’ve been thinking about icebergs and shampoo.

We got up early, made toasted sausage sandwiches on sourdough rolls with hash browns for the skateboarding teens who slept over, then walked the dog in the drizzle.

And while I was in the shower after all of that, I thought about a simple fix that always makes me feel better: the smell of shampoo and conditioner.

To me, shampoo smells like hope.

It means — I’m going to give this thing another shot, scrub up and head back out there. It means — the day could be good (or even great, or better than I expected). It’s a small bit of hope in a bottle: the smell of your own fresh, clean hair or the smell of a child’s hair after the bath. Isn’t that scent a gift?

Because for all of us the icebergs exist.

Most of what is going on in our lives lies beneath the parts of ourselves we share. Think about social media, and all that perfection (the crop, the filter, the angles). Think about the last conversation you had with a friend and what you didn’t reveal.

Whether or not we do it online or do it in real life, it’s easy to fall into the trap of Being What We Think The World Expects.

But here’s the thing: we can be who we are. Right this second, in our own internal worlds: we can be all of it, the iceberg and the shampoo. Today, we can let our shoulders drop and be imperfect.

Be the one who has a hard time when she tries to change herself.

The one who still criticises, or overeats, or over-drinks. The one who meant to start working out three months ago and has done it twice. The one who said the wrong thing and didn’t get the project finished (or even started).

You are loved right now, like you are: imperfect and trying. So am I.

Yes, yes, you can do better. We all can, and we will keep on trying. But for today — hugs to you where you are.

The iceberg is real, but so is the shampoo. Fresh starts are here for all of us.

Sending you rainy day best wishes today.

Love, Catherine x

PS.

  • No judgement at all, but if over-drinking is a thing you’re thinking about coming into the holidays, my incredible cousin at The Bubble Hour podcast has written a helpful book called The Unpickled Holiday Survival Guide. Today it’s on super-sale at amazon for $7! You can find it here.

  • And hey, it’s Jacaranda season soon. My picture book, Jacaranda Snow, is available online everywhere and in bookshops Australia-wide. Free delivery worldwide on Book Depository!

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Do overs, and why I need one.

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Happy Sunday, everyone.

Today, a very quick tribute to this beautiful country…

I walked into a shopping mall in Sydney and on the way to the ladies’ room found this on the wall.

Reset! Take a moment to relax and just breathe.

The sign got me thinking — first I swelled up with pride because Australia is amazing, and how wonderful is this sign in a shopping mall? I mean…how thoughtful. The wall could have been blank, millions of people over the years could have just walked by, but instead, someone had the idea to use a WALL to HELP PEOPLE.

Australia, you’re cheeky and fun and also inspiring.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what it means to reset. Maybe to do-over. To take off the things we no longer need as if we’re shedding a huge hot jacket on a climb up a hill. I watched a favourite Instagrammer, Mel Robbins, talk about it this week.

  • What should I shed?

  • What could I try to do over?

  • Is it time for a reset?

Today I’m sitting with these questions, and I wonder if they might also be helpful for you. I don’t have any answers for us, but often I find the questions are the best place to start.

Rest, relax and enjoy your day. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in fifty years of living, we can actually find a way to do-over a lot of things (once we know what needs doing)!

Love Catherine x

PS.

  • Fun stuff…I did some early Christmas shopping in the Amazon Prime sale days this past week, I got my favourite OPI nail polish for my own Christmas stocking. Love this colour!

  • In case you missed it, I wrote about nail polish and mum life here.

We All Need This Question

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Hi there — for fun today, here’s a gorgeous screen shot of the talented Marilyn Monroe from a film I don’t recognise.

THAT OUTFIT.

Doesn’t she look like a woman who is owning her day?

This photo makes me think so many things:

  1. Why do we judge beautiful women?

  2. What stops us from being a little “extra”? I mean, the nails, the bling-y jewels, that sash, the colours…everything Marilyn is wearing says, “MORE can be GOOD!” I forget this all too often, and sometimes devolve into a colourless life.

  3. Is it time to add a little spice to our day?

But more than these questions, the photo of Marilyn makes me think this:

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Judgement.

Same old habits.

Forgetting that I can choose a little bling, a little bright lipstick, a fun song while I’m walking.

Am I ready to let go of the way I’ve always been?

What — exactly — am I ready to let go of?

What are you ready to let go of?

(This question makes my brain buzz with possibility!)

Ohhhhh, wish you were here at my kitchen table because I’d love love love to hear your answers! Tell me, is there one thing YOU’RE ready to let go of?

Love Catherine x

Martha Beck's Secret to Life

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Hello there!

In case the world feels a little crazy to you right now, I thought I’d share a quote I heard this week and absolutely loved.

If there’s a secret to life, it’s this:
Find people you like, and do stuff with them.
— Martha Beck, bestselling author and speaker

Simple and absolutely true.

Have you found your “people you like”? For me, 100% it’s my own family. I love (but also really really like) my sons. The older one is precise and analytical — a reader, a thinker, a talker, a breaker of chains. I can’t wait to see what he’ll offer the world. The younger one is warm and street smart — a reader of people, a creator, a builder, the one who draws together a circle of friends. He’s the glue everyone needs. And my partner is my truest friend — so smart, with wisdom to make the long shots I can’t even see, a foundation and a bridge for hundreds of people at work (and for us, too).

The family I chose and made …those are “my people.” It’s a little insular, but there’s nothing I love more than spending time with them. If you read my new book, you’ll know my favourite time of day is twilight. This photo captures one of my favourite memories with my people — dusk at Hyams Beach, three kilometres of deserted white sand, just us, laughing and running. There was a good dinner ahead of us, spaghetti bolognese cooked by me, a family movie night, beds to snuggle into, warm baths, clean sheets. This little trio — husband, son, son — is my greatest joy.

Today I’m thinking of Martha Beck’s secret to life.

Choose your people. Choose well. And do stuff with them. That really is the secret.

Happy Friday, everyone. I know things are tough out there, so that’s all the more reason to hang on to the people we love. Or this — go and find “your people”. I know they’re out there.

Enjoy your Friday.

Love, Catherine x

PS. It’s time for 31 Crush, and Victoria (the creator) is “the Victoria” in Chapter 2 of my new book, The 10 Minute Fix. She’s a creative dynamo, so lovely and so much fun! You can be coached by Victoria for the month of August — pay what you can — to fall in love with a new activity, habit or pursuit in August. Email Victoria to learn more. I did 31 Crush last year and it was magic!

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Is This Something You Do?

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It’s a rainy winter Sunday for us in Sydney. My older son just got back from a two hour hike (packing 30 kilos of weights) in the bush; my younger one is sleeping in after a late-night skateboarding session in the garage with a mate.

I’m up with coffee and candles, lamps on, watching the early morning rain.

Resting.

Is this something you do? Do you prioritise rest?

Do you give yourself permission to slow down and actually enjoy resting? I’m bad at this but I’m trying to get better. I’m learning that rest needs to be deliberate and planned in order to feel like a break (for me). Now that work has spilled over into our home lives in the past decade—and even more so during COVID—it’s important to decide when we’ll rest.

We’re trying to take Sunday as a rest day.

No work. No emails. No sneaky copywriting to get ahead for the week. No book writing.

Are you going to rest this weekend? Can you plan a rest you actually enjoy? (Coffee, candles, a good book. A nap, a walk, some time to daydream.)

I’m sure you deserve it.

Love Catherine x

PS. Thinking of you all as the world turns and Covid surges back and forth. I hope you and yours are well. If work is a problem, I hope you find a way to create something new. I’ve been there during the Global Financial Crisis and it’s so hard…when you’re stressed and worried and can barely think through all that fear. Reach out if you need a little encouragement. I’m here.

13 Ways Of Looking At Everything

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Last week, Yvette brought me tulips—and look at them. Don’t you love their sense of independence? Don’t you love how they find their own way?

They fling themselves about as if they don’t know they’re pretty.

Behind the tulips and above my kitchen table, you’ll see the poem I wrote about in The 10 Minute Fix. These four framed stanzas are from Wallace Steven’s “Thirteen Ways of Looking at a Blackbird,” published over 100 years ago in Harmonium in 1917.

I wrote about stanza II in my book, but my favourite at the moment is stanza XIII, covered by tulips.

It was evening all afternoon.
It was snowing
And it was going to snow.
The blackbird sat in the cedar-limbs.
— Wallace Stevens

If you were here this morning, we’d have a coffee together. We’d sit at this table and I’d offer you something delicious on a china plate. We’d talk like friends do, first about one of us, and then the other. We’d trade stories and remind each other that Covid can’t last forever, that people are basically good, that every day something wonderful happens to someone.

We’d admire the tulips.

You’d make me laugh and I’d make you another coffee. (I’m a lot of things, but hardly ever funny.)

We’d find 13 ways to look at things and together we’d fix up our worlds.

Isn’t friendship everything?

Aren’t we lucky?

Right now, after you finish reading, please text a friend you love. Let’s just do this—tell the women in our worlds that we appreciate them. It’s a 10 Minute Fix I didn’t write about, but should have.

We’re all so busy, flinging this way and that, but the heartbeat of our lives is staying connected.

Enjoy your Friday and stay safe out there.

I’m thinking of you.

Love Catherine x

PS. If you’d love to pick up a beautiful book of poetry, try The Ember Ever There. The author, Jean McCarthy, is my beautiful cousin and friend. You can find it here in Canada, in America and in Australia.

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Ta Da! The Winners are...

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It’s winter school holidays in Australia, and we had a little beach break this weekend.

Walking these three kilometres of pure white sand with my parka on made me yearn for a beach home. I don’t know about you, but as every year passes for me, I’m looking for more simplicity in the little things. Nature. A drive to a beach for the day. Fresh air!

Oh, I would love to live near this beach! But…it wouldn’t be easy.

Or would it?

Are some changes far easier to make than we think?

I love this question and I’m learning to ask it more:

What would this look like if it were easy?
— Tim Ferriss
  • What if book sales were easy?

  • What if talking with my teen was easy?

  • What if finding a partner was easy?

  • What if getting healthier was easy?

  • What if buying a beach house was easy?

My mind always jumps straight to this will be hard. But…what if it was easy? How would that look?

If we open up to the possibility and ask our minds the question, it gives our brains a chance to come up with some solutions.

Try it about your biggest challenge right now. Ask yourself, “What if <insert here> was easy?”

It makes you feel different, doesn’t it? It makes me think there’s a chance for a victory, and also helps me see a bunch of good ideas I haven’t seen before.

Before I head off into my Sunday, full of house cleaning, gardening and dog walks, I have a 10 Minute Fix Book Giveaway to announce!

I love giving! For everyone who entered to win a copy of The 10 Minute Fix for yourself or a friend who needs a boost, here are the 5 winners. (I’ve emailed you asking for your postal address!)

  • Jennifer

  • Leah

  • Heather

  • Carolyn

  • Laura

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Enjoy!

Love Catherine

PS. LOVE hearing your feedback on my new book! Got this message this week: “I love Fix #90—you are not for everyone. Literally walked out of my bedroom and talked about it with my teenage daughter. It’s the lesson I wish I’d learned at 16. It would have saved me so much grief.”

Okay, book sales! (“What if book sales were easy, Catherine???”) Available online or in select Aussie bookshops:

A Secret...

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Hello and wow, haven’t we all been learning and growing lately?

2020 has been a lot to process. So I thought I’d pop by this morning and tell you a little story about my world here in Sydney. (It’s not a BIG story, but I thought you might need a breather from all the news, so if you do, please read on!)

In the last few months, my side of the bed slowly turned from refuge into war zone.

Why? Mid-life, waking up in the night, feeling too hot…just uncomfortable.

Really, between the poor sleep and the nightly waking up and the blankets I just didn’t love and the floppy duvet cover, I was feeling awful in the mornings. In fact, I was feeling so awful that I dreaded getting into bed at night because I thought I was going to have another poor sleep.

This went on for months. Literally months.

So this is what I did—and it’s GENIUS. And it’s so simple that I’m surprised I didn’t see this earlier. I realised an important truth:

To change things, I have to CHANGE things. (I know, basic, right? But why did I overlook this?)

  • I stripped off all the blankets from our bed.

  • I washed the duvet cover and got it ready for the donation pile.

  • Then I drove to the mall, walked into my favourite bedding shop (still open as an essential business during COVID), and bought the softest, snuggliest grey winter blanket I could find. See it up there?? That one. It was surprisingly inexpensive.

I came home, laundered everything and remade my bed. The duvet that had been driving me crazy is gone. In its place is a very affordable new blanket—so soft, so big, so warm-but-not-hot. And I have slept so much better every night since.

Such a small fix to such a huge problem, but the change had to start with me.

The fix: to change things, we actually have to CHANGE things.

We have to say ENOUGH, make a decision and activate ourselves.

We have to decide, then do.

Is there a small change you need to make to feel better now? Or a bigger change? You can do it. (Decide, then do.)

Sending you love today from my home to yours.

Catherine x

PS.

  • Still excited to share my special project with you—coming soon!

  • New people, I’m so happy to see you here. Take a look at what you’ve missed so far!

How are you?

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In case you haven’t been asked, I’m asking.

How are you?

You may be feeling like I am: overwhelmed, sickened, sad.

But also this—I have hope. I believe people can choose to be decent and learn. We can offer grace to each other.

We can support with our money, our focused listening, our words, our silence, and our care. There is so much we can do: seek out businesses to buy from in America (here is a fantastic list of women business owners and their lovely products on Instagram via @younghouselove—go to the Make Change button), get curious, buy books, question our assumptions, talk to our kids and grow. March. Ponder. Listen. Donate. Think deeply. Change.

We can be kind, right now, right this second, to the person in front of us.

That’s how we begin.

Thinking of you today. I hope you are okay.

Love, Catherine x

ps. Please notice that the world is still a beautiful place. The moon rises, the oceans swell and surge, the trees are lace at twilight. We can change together.

Something special is coming soon...

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Right now: hot black coffee and a beautiful cool autumn, a teen at a sleepover and a goodie bag of homemade rocky road given to us after a dinner with friends.

It’s a dog on lap kind of morning.

And this is what I’m thinking.

We can be who we ARE right this second.

Let’s let our shoulders drop and be imperfect.

Be the one who has a hard time when she tries to change herself. The one who still criticises, or overeats, or drinks. The one who meant to start working out three months ago and has done it twice. The one who said the wrong thing and didn’t get the project finished (or even started).

It’s okay.

We are loveable right now, like we are: imperfect and trying. Human, like everyone else.

Yes, yes, we can do better, and we will keep on trying.

But for today — hugs to you right where you are.

This is where we begin.

Love, Catherine x

  • Stay tuned — next Sunday, there’s something special coming for you! Yayyyyyyy!

  • Thank you for joining my Facebook Group. Now I need to figure out how to throw a party in there?! Yes, I’ll still blog here twice a week—every Friday and Sunday, Sydney time. Everyone is welcome to join.

Roll Up Your Sleeves, Girls

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This week, I listened to Cheryl Strayed speak with Margaret Atwood, my favourite Canadian author. (My dream came true when Margaret wrote to me about my novel, Love Lie Repeatyou can read about that here if you’re interested.)

On the podcast, Margaret explained that her mother used to say, “Roll up your sleeves, girls!”

It’s a little bit old-fashioned, but I love the sentiment. How does it strike you?

As I said a while ago, I’m a do-er during quarantine, not a pause-r. Both responses and everything in between are absolutely valid, but for me, doing really helps me feel better. So while everyone else on the Internet made sourdough, I did, too.

And actually, it’s easy.

First you make a starter, which is just equal parts flour and water exposed to the air for a few days so you catch natural yeast. You keep it on the bench top and feed it more flour and water every day until you get around one cup. That’s the minimum amount of starter you’ll need to make a loaf of bread. You can save the rest in your fridge and feed it weekly if you want to make more loaves.

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The truly interesting part of the process was how complicated writers and foodies are making this whole sourdough thing sound. Search around the Internet and you’ll find complex videos and blog posts galore. A zillion of them.

But I’m a woman who had a “Roll up your sleeves, girls” mother — just like Margaret Atwood did. And I spent my whole childhood on the farm, watching her routinely take four loaves of bread out of the oven AT A TIME every Saturday morning. For me, a total beginner, baking ONE loaf of bread felt like no big deal.

So I just did it. Found a recipe, cut out the complicated parts, made a starter with flour and water, fed it for a couple of days and then made a loaf of bread.

And this is the power of example.

I watched some one do it, so I could do it, too.

It’s a really important reminder. It’s easy to see someone else doing something and think it’s too hard, rarified, only for experts, impossible for us to do. Or we can feel jealous — as if the person we’re watching has superpowers that we don’t.

But if we roll up our sleeves, we can do so much.

Figure it out.

Give it a go (or give it a shot, if you live in North America).

Baking bread, writing a book, starting a business, making a tough phone call, healing a relationship…the first steps are all the same.

Baby steps.

If someone else has done it before us, we can too.

Time to roll up your sleeves, girls. Today might be the perfect day to tackle something you’ve always wanted to start.

Sending love to you and yours on this beautiful weekend. I hope everyone is keeping well and safe…and I’m thinking of you.

Catherine x

PS.

  • Want the recipe I used for sourdough? Let me know!

  • And if you want to read my first novel, a YA thriller, you can find it here. My first picture book is here. Currently working on a new non-fiction book and I’m excited to share that with you :) It’s very different from my novel. Stay tuned!

Find a Secret Zone In Your Home

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I am a do-er, and I’m trying everything right now. You?

We’re all different, of course, but for me, being productive and getting my mind interested in new things just works better. I feel happier, more like myself, and more able to help others.

Hello, yoga.

I tried it when I was nineteen, and spent the whole class literally tapping my fingers on the ground impatiently waiting to get out of the little room filled with flexible people.

Now I’m 53.

I’ve been meaning to try yoga for a zillion years because I’m not flexible enough. So in this time of world pandemic, where everything is going crazy and we’re all worried, I decided to carve out a little space to get started.

Have you done this yet? Re-evaluated your home looking for small zones where you can try something new?

Please try! No matter how tiny your living space, it’s exciting to look at it with fresh eyes and wonder what you can make of it.

It reminds me of two things — when you have a dream that your house has an extra room, and you get to explore it. Remember how amazing this is?

It also reminds me of a favourite picture book I found when I was a girl. It was first published in 1967 and reprinted in 1993. Evan’s Corner is about a little boy in New York City, youngest of six like me, who lived in an apartment. (I lived in a big old farmhouse on a sprawling Canadian wheat farm.) Evan didn’t have his own space, so his Mum let him have a corner of the apartment. And in his corner, he made a beautiful creative ‘room’. He taped pictures to the wall, found a milk crate, a tiny rug, a stack of books, and a pet turtle. As a kid, I admired his spirit and ingenuity.

As an adult in “shelter at home” mode, I’ve found these zones:

  • Pulled a chair and footstool into a sunny corner, opened the blinds, and created a ‘reading nook’

  • Parked the car outside the garage to have ‘a gym’

  • Enjoyed a facial in my ‘spa’ — a freshly cleaned bathroom, with a newly laundered set of towels

And yesterday, I shifted over my son’s cello and found a mat-sized space on the floor that I now call My Yoga Studio. My family finds it hilarious every time I say My Yoga Studio and walk to the side of a room, but I feel WAY more motivated when I create a space for myself and talk about it.

A mat, a candle, a laptop. Free classes online at YouTube.

Really, we are so lucky.

While we worry about the world, we can also learn and grow.

What are you doing during this time? Let me know — inspire me!

Love Catherine x

PS. If you, like me, are trying to find ways to help, this mask effort is amazing. It was spearheaded by four people who are getting masks from a Mexican factory FedExed to New York City, minus any red tape or delays. Learn more here.

How Are You Today?

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Wondering about you…

And sending love from Sydney.

Today I have simple plans and simple pleasures: a family dinner, a zoom call with girlfriends, coffee in the sun on the patio. I’ll probably make a special dessert.

A little writing. A little worry.

I’m thinking of everyone who is reading this today — about job interruption and finances, about close quarters and strained relationships, about kids and stress and fear. But I’m also trying to remember the other side of this hard time: we are all here now, everyone in the world, together.

We will find out together how this turns out.

If you have any extra time, tell me how you’re doing today. Cheer me up :) I’m thinking of you.

Love Catherine x

PS.

If you don’t already know her, consider following Morgan Harper Nichols on Instagram. Her work is lovely. You can find her here.



An Antidote to Worry

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Hello — dropping in to see how everyone is today.

Doing okay? Worried? A mix of both? (I don’t know about you, but I don’t normally scrub my beans in hot water and soap. Except now I do. Welcome to the new normal…)

During this time of physical distancing, when we’re all taking extra care to keep each other healthy, it’s easy to worry.

A dear American friend and coach, Victoria, mentioned something on Instagram that I loved. When we have a worry thought, Vic said, we should test it.

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The word that got me is “actionable”.

So much of the time, my worry is me rocking faster in a rocking chair — going nowhere. Got the visual?? My mind just zooms off into the worry without asking, what is actionable? What can I do?

If the worry thought is none of these things — actionable, useful, accurate — we need to drop it.

When the worry is real, we need to make a decision, figure out one tiny step forward and act. I’m going to take Vic’s advice and give it a try. I need to remember the Worry Test.

Love Catherine x

PS.

  • Want some coaching from Victoria? You can find her here! Thank you for being a bright light in the world, Vic!

  • Want some of my surplus mum-love, now that my teens are tired of it and just want to do school work and watch YouTube videos in peace? Ha! Send me an email if you need encouragement during this tough time. I’m here, girlfriend.

Outside or In?

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It’s Sunday, and in Australia we’re still able to be outside and move around (responsibly). How are you?

None of us could have imagined where we are now, worldwide, and I’m encouraged to see all the love and help floating around the internet.

People are offering their talents and keeping us entertained.

People are giving and sharing.

Yesterday, I gave away clean new moving boxes stored in our garage, and also a copy of my novel.

Today, I’ll quickly share two things I’ve done online and loved. Free classes:

  1. Tap Dancing for beginners — with @sourtaps (Sarah Reich)

  2. Brioche and bread making — with @zoebakes (Zoe Francois)

Whether you’re outside or in, take care and share.

We’re in this together.

Love, Catherine x

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Something Pretty

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Welcome to my neighbourhood in the evening.

Gum trees.

Sunset.

Fruit bats.

My husband and I love to do our garage workout and take a six kilometre walk in the evening. It’s not as productive as running, but it’s slow and pretty and a great way to catch up on each other’s day.

It’s the little things.

During these wild times — when there is so much advice and fear floating around — I wanted to drop into your inbox with something pretty.

So for you, today, an Australian sunset, and the wise words of Julian of Norwich (1342-1416). This poster is available on Etsy for $3, and now’s a perfect time to support small business! You can download and print immediately. The sellers are South Pacific Prints and they seem like a lovely young couple.

I hope you and yours are okay.

Love Catherine x

10 Ways To Get Unstuck

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If you’re curious to read more, I’m guessing you’ve been stuck yourself. You know the feeling, right? It’s an ugly cocktail of confusion / doubt / worry with a big dash of lack of motivation.

For the past couple of months, this was my reality — and I needed to get through to the other side. And I have, just recently.

So if you’re also stuck, these tips might help.

  1. Get dressed up. Putting on something that makes you look and feel good always helps. Always. My first boss told me this: the worse I feel, the better I need to dress. It’s actually good advice. So if you’ve recently gained a little weight (hello, this always happens when I’m stuck!), find something to put on that still feels good and looks good. You may not even realise you haven’t dressed your best for a while.

  2. Figure out what you need to feel more like yourself. For me, this includes drinking LOTS more water, going for walks and getting to bed earlier. It also includes smelling lovely when I get into bed, so that means a nice shower or bath and favourite pjs.

  3. Get an objective opinion from someone you trust. If you’re currently beating yourself up about being stuck, and hating all the confusion about where to go next, tell a person you trust. Admit that you need some wisdom. People are so smart! And generally everyone loves to provide advice.

  4. Remind yourself you’re doing the best you can. Wow, we can be so hard on ourselves.

  5. Start something new. Anything! Drop the heavy thing you’re worried about for today, and do something fun. But make sure it’s actually fun for you. You’d be surprised how many times we think we’re doing something fun, but it’s not really our type of fun. Example: I don’t love to travel. But travel is fun, right?? Except honestly, it’s not fun for me. Buying new books is my kind of fun.

  6. Zig where you used to zag. If you get up early, try sleeping in a little. If you run, try doing a massive walk instead. Get a coffee from a different cafe. Listen to country instead of pop, or jazz instead of classical. Drive a different route.

  7. Be productive in another way. If you’re stuck about a relationship decision or with your career, clean your kitchen drawers. Weed out your closet. Get your hair trimmed. Clean the barbecue.

  8. Ask five whys. Ask yourself why you’re stuck. Then continue with “And why is that?” Do it five times to drill down and get to the heart of what’s happening.

  9. Admit you’re afraid. Being stuck is always about fear. So announce that you’re afraid and tell yourself that you’ll try your best to be brave.

  10. Practice being hopeful. Oh, this is big. Sometimes when I’m stuck, though I know I should be grateful, I really want to whack the person who reminds me to count my blessings. So I try to practice being hopeful instead. Ask yourself this important question:

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And there you have it. My top ten ways to get unstuck.

Sending heaps of good vibes from sunny Australia!

Love Catherine x

PS. New people — you’re so welcome here! Thanks for signing up. I blog twice a week as I’m learning to love my age. If you have any ideas you’d like to share, email me!

Be Fun To Live With

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Well, here’s a big question for us all.

Ready?

It’s confronting.

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We lose sight of this so easily. Every single day, we have the choice to approach our worlds with joy, and often we’re lost in our worries.

This week, heading out to wine and cheese on a friend’s deck overlooking the Aussie bush at dusk, it would have been just as easy NOT to be fun. Instead, another friend suggested we wear our pink wigs to the door.

Such a tiny thing, and it brought so much laughter.

It makes me wonder this: why do we default into little lives? Why — when it takes hardly any planning, and very little money and almost no extra effort — do we forget to be FUN?

It’s almost as if we’ve forgotten that fun is an option. But there it is, waiting for us to get creative.

Fun transforms us into better versions of ourselves. Oh, yes, there will be teens rolling their eyes and maybe grumbling, but it’s a risk worth taking.

Being fun is not just ‘having fun.’ There’s a difference.

It’s Friday in Australia. The weekend is calling to us all. Can we be more fun to live with today?

Let’s live in joy…and love our age.

Catherine x

PS. Celebrities, pole dancing, comparison, being fifty, authenticity, building businesses and more — I had a fun conversation with Merilyn on her podcast, Lead Your Day. You can listen here!

Add In (Don't Take Away)

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Every morning this summer, I’ve picked a few fresh raspberries from my garden.

In Australia, this is a big deal because raspberries are so expensive and people don’t really plant raspberries in suburban gardens.

This tiny ritual reminds me of my Canadian childhood on the farm, and the endless row of raspberries that my mum, my three sisters and I would pick in the summer.

Talking, two sisters per side picking slowly up the row, wearing long sleeved men’s shirts to save our arms from scratches, and the pails tied into the shirttails around our waists…that was being a sister. I learned a lot about life in the raspberry patch.

When my sister visited Sydney last year, as a surprise for me she bought and planted two raspberry canes in my garden. It was a perfect spot for them, and I was shocked: I’d overlooked even the possibility that raspberries could grow here, or that I could have them.

She added in raspberries to my life.

She added in a little unexpected gardening, too — and I was a person who always said she did not want to garden. But honestly, I’ve enjoyed it.

Adding in can be so good for us.

We’re often consumed with the idea of taking away: getting rid of bad habits, stopping the chocolate, denying ourselves.

Today, is there something you can add in to your world?

Something that gives you unexpected pleasure?

Something that isn’t too much work, but is filled with beautiful memories?

Take a moment to think. You deserve these little bursts of happiness.

I hope you find something special that you can add in.

Love Catherine x

PS. Welcome this week to everyone whose joined us lately! Want to have a look around my new website, Love Our Age?

Margaret Atwood, The Handmaid's Tale and Me

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Imagine a 24 year old Catherine in an emerald green dress.

It was the 90s and I was young, and I was in a competition to win a job teaching English at a beautiful private high school on Vancouver Island in Canada. Six other teachers applied, and we were asked to teach a sample lesson to a year 12 class with members from the English Department judging our performance from the back of the room.

I taught an excerpt from Margaret Atwood’s The Handmaid’s Tale.

Out of seven of us, I got the job.

Then glance back, ten years earlier, in Saskatchewan: Catherine at 14. Long brown hair, sitting by myself in a tiny country school library, figuring out love. I’d found a book of poetry, with one line that read:

You fit into me
like a hook into an eye
a fish hook
an open eye
— Margaret Atwood

And for some reason, my heart connected with Margaret Atwood’s words. Over the years I’ve read every book Atwood has written. I’ve taught her poems.

We share a publisher — Penguin Books. I wrote my own novel inspired by my favourite Atwood poem, “Siren Song.”

Last week, I listened to her speak in Sydney, my home for the past 23 years. The week before that, on a rainy Tuesday, I found a letter from her in my mailbox, soaking wet, encouraging me in my writing career.

I dried it carefully and framed it on my study wall.

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I’m writing all of this to say we have no idea what will become of us.

If I could tell that 14 year old girl in the country school that I would be Australian, she wouldn’t have believed me. Or an author? She would have wanted that, but probably not had any idea how she would do such a thing.

But let’s get to the interesting part: you.

What wonderful thing don’t you know about your own future?

Though my worried mind often turns otherwise, I like to ask myself this:

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To you, to me.

What is the best thing?

The best is possible. Life brings us unbelievable gifts, and pain, and lessons…and joy. If we’re lucky, we even fulfil a dream or two.

I like to believe the best is yet to come. I hope you do, too.

Let’s love our age,

Catherine x